A Mixture of Opposites

One chapter in any elementary Chemistry textbook is “Elements, Compounds and Mixtures”. If one recollects the definition, a mixture is a physical combination of ≥ two substances that retains their original identities. In our lives, all hope for “compatible” people, who are more conspicuous by their absence. This story is about two girls who happened to lead a part of their life’s journey together.

          There were two room- mates in a college hostel, named Anita and Sunita (Ani and Suni for short). Apart from the roof, they shared an amiable nature, and would go to college together. Suni was two years senior, so her class timings did not necessarily coincide with Ani’s. They started for college together, even if either of them did not have a class then- they followed a routine, and that was a good start for the day. Ani was extroverted and boisterous, while Suni was introverted and silent. Ani was plump and healthy, and Suni was slim but weak. May be because opposite poles attract, they got along well.

         One year passed. The two girls continued to be room-mates in a different hostel block, and were happy to be together again. The stress of the final year began to work on Suni. As she struggled to cope with the curriculum and the need to have a job handy (updating her CV every now and then to suit the requirement of the organization applied for) on the one hand, and preparing for competitive examinations (GATE, GRE, TOEFL, Indian Engineering Services and Civil Services Examinations) on the other, she really lost the personal touch with Ani. They still left for college together, and unlike in the previous year, their conversation did not take place about the beautiful flowers or the properly manicured lawn that they passed by- if they talked about the Sun, it would be on the hottest time in the day or the four hottest places on Earth, or in India, in their ascending or descending order; if they observed the clouds, Suni would talk about rain- bearing clouds, clouds and altitude, cloud seeding and what not. She was at the take off stage of a bright career, hopefully. Ani was absolutely uninterested. One, she was not a perspective planner unlike Suni. She took each day as it came to her, and strived to make the best of it (which could even mean idling all day). Two, she didn’t take the link between her studies and career very seriously. ‘Let me get to the fourth year, I’ll think about career’, she told Suni whenever the latter tried to make Ani shed her lethargy and work hard. ‘In any case, I’m not keen to have a career in first place, I’m ready to settle down as a home- maker’, she would add, knowing fully well that Suni wouldn’t continue the conversation with a deeply depressing yet perfectly play- safe and practical ‘What-if-you-lose- your- husband- to- death- or- divorce’ query. Suni respected others’ views, so she never liked imposition of hers on them or, theirs on her, as she had a mind of her own. Winning the argument did not matter, but there was a need to counsel her young and irresponsible room- mate, which she could not overlook. Three, Ani was a pampered child from a well- to- do family. Often she was selfish and expected others to pamper her always. Because Suni was a responsible girl and took it upon herself to be Ani’s local guardian, she often ended up being indulgent with Ani, with an occasional reprimand. Four, she was moon- struck. She had fallen for Sunil, Suni’s batch- mate. Initially, when Ani enquired about him, Suni talked well about him. That made Ani more determined to get him. Since it was one- sided, Ani did not mention it in clear terms to Suni, but apparently now her interest in keeping Suni’s company was to discuss Sunil in some way or the other. ‘How are you guys coping with studies? I’m sure the boys must be having a tough time, too. They’ll have less time to enjoy life, right?’ she would say. Suni the feminist would never like this kind of sympathy. ‘I too want to enjoy life, but it is more important that I should stand on my feet’, she would retort.

          One day, it so happened that Suni and Sunil were discussing some team project while snacking in the canteen when Ani entered. Suni did not expect anything amiss when the outgoing and warm Ani pulled a chair and sat down, screaming ‘Hello’ twice, intended to greet each of those already seated separately. ‘Sunil, this is my room- mate Anita, II year, ECE’, Suni introduced. ‘Hi, Anita’, said Sunil, extending is hand. Ani eagerly shook her hand warmly with Sunil, saying, ‘Hi Sunil, just call me Ani’. ‘Madam, will you permit us to complete our project in time?’ asked Suni. ‘Ok, bye’, said Ani in a disheartened way. ‘May be Ani wants to talk something urgent’, said Sunil. That brought a smile to her face. ‘We’ve been room- mates for more than a year now. I know from her look that there’s no urgency. We can talk about it later. See you later, Ani’, replied Suni as she diverted her attention to her Lenovo notebook. Ani left the table in a huff, and Sunil had noticed it.

          When Suni returned to the room after sitting with her team- mates and finishing off her project work, she was greeted with loud, blaring music. Of course, Ani was fond of playing her music loud, and singing along with it, but 10 p.m. was certainly not the right time to do it, especially when she wasn’t alone in her room!

‘Ani, I’m exhausted. Can you please turn it off?’

‘No, I cannot’, came the loud answer. Suni couldn’t believe her ears. Ani looked at the rack where she was re- arranging the clothes (rather, arranging them in an orderly way). Suni decided to try again. May be, Ani had not heard it right the first time! This time, the answer was all the more assertive and louder. ‘I already told you I can’t. C-A-N-T can’t. Do u get it?’

‘But I am tired after all the brain storming and exertion’.

‘You didn’t listen to me in the evening, so I will not listen to you now’, was Ani’s reply, which was more than impish in tone, and pretty close to being classified as sinister.

Still not wanting to pick up a fight or an argument, Suni asked, ’Tell me now.’

‘Nothing’. It sounded indifferent. That was the last straw for Suni.

‘Ah, nothing! Great, you wanted to disturb my studies in the evening for NOTHING, and now you want to disturb my sleep for NOTHING! I’ll have NOTHING of it!’

‘Tch’. It was indifference again. Now Suni was not just feeling bad, she felt harassed. She did something that she’d never have done to others- shut off the lid of the Macbook Air of Ani’s. In a few seconds, the laptop went into sleep mode, stopping the music abruptly. Ani turned around only to see an angry Suni walking towards her bed. She almost said something to Suni, but pulled herself back.

          The next morning, the two went to college together amid an uncomfortable silence. In the evening, on returning home, Ani hugged Suni and apologized to her. The latter was glad that the brat realised her mistake. What she had not realised was that Ani was happy only because she was able to break the ice with Sunil over lunch (now, she didn’t have to blame Suni for making her miss the opportunity!).

          Time passed by. By now, Ani would keep out of the room after class hours, officially for “study and play”, but to spend endless hours, directly or indirectly, with Sunil. The direct hours were too few and far between, mostly over a cup of tea and a plate of snacks in the canteen, if others did not join the group then. Ani took pains to share all her details and problems with Sunil, who, being a soft- natured good listener, paid attention to all that. If Sunil practiced soccer, Ani would stand by the line and cheer him; if he played Table Tennis, she would either join him as a doubles partner or set up a match with him; if he and his friends went out for a movie, she’d request that she join them. By this way, she kept herself within Sunil’s audio- visual range. She would also discretely collect details about him and exult at the good things she’d heard about him.

          Suni, lost in her own world, was unaware of what Ani was up to. Sunil and Ani did not become a part of college gossip, due to some other reason. That was independently known to Suni and Sunil, but not to Ani.

          One night, Suni checked the watch because she felt hungry as well as sleepy. It was 2 a.m. This kind of exertion coupled with uncertainty- induced stress made her hungry at inane hours. She opened the snack rack. She had filled it with some junk food just a couple of days back. All that she could find was a couple of empty wrappers. She could understand that Ani would have swiped it off either alone or in company. Among them, they would ensure adequate stocking of “emergency snacks”, though they did not bother who paid for them. One snack shop on campus was a nocturnal, but it involved a walk of half- a- kilometer from her room. Suni had never walked alone at that hour. Though their campus was perfectly safe, she was not upto it then. She turned towards Ani, who was fast asleep. That put her into a Hamlet- like dilemma, to wake Ani or not. Hunger got the better of her, and she decided to wake her up. Ani was groggy, so she became fussy at being waken up. Suni was herself tired, so she said in a stern voice, ‘Ani, will you come with me to the All- Night Snack Shop to pick up something?’

‘When did you become a kid? Can’t you go buy it yourself?’

‘I am scared to walk at this hour. Please come along won’t you?’

What’s this nonsense … You are disturbing me..’. Ani began to drop expletives.

‘Hold your tongue, you brat! You eat up all the snacks, leave nothing for emergency hunger and talk rubbish when I ask you politely? You were out of the room till midnight, and don’t care to remember to buy some replenishment’.

‘Do what you want to do. I’m not coming’.

Suni was deeply hurt. But she was hungry. She did not want to disturb any other girl- each one may have one’s own reason for not coming along. Though she was unwilling, she decided to request Sunil for help. ‘Did I wake you up, Sunil? Sorry for calling you up at an odd hour’.

‘I was working on the individual project due for submission tomorrow. It’ll take an hour more. Tell me, what made you call up at this time?’

‘I’m sorry, but I wouldn’t want to distract you from your work. We’ll catch up in class tomorrow. Good night.’

‘Hold on Suni. There should have been some pressing need that forced you to call me now. Tell me about it.’

‘Actually, I’m hungry and have nothing to eat. I apologise for my carelessness in not replenishing my stock. Can you please get me something from the snack shop?’

‘Sure. Please reach your main gate in fifteen minutes’.

          Suni opened her purse, took out a hundred rupee note, and walked downstairs, being extremely cautious of the sound she may make, that could disturb others. She told the surprised guard on duty (who would never abandon his post) that she had to collect a snack packet. ‘You may listen to my conversation with my class- mate, if you want,’ said she. Suni was well known for her studious and straight nature, so the guard did not tail her enough to be in hearing range, though she was within sight.

          ‘Thanks for all the strain you’ve taken, despite the home work’, Suni said, adding, ‘I cannot repay your help. Let me at least pay for the snack’. She held out the currency note and said, ‘Don’t bother to look for change now. You can return the balance tomorrow’.

          ‘This is from your room. So there’s no need to pay. Yesterday, when I was heading to the canteen after TT, Ani offered to get it from your room. She brought a lot of them, in fact! She got a call from home, so she left abruptly. I took the balance snacks to my room. What I brought u right now is what I’d have returned to you in class’.

          Suni was dazed. Before she could react, Sunil said, ‘You are tired indeed. Good night. I should now catch up with my work’. ‘Thanks and good night’, she replied.

          Ani raised the issue the next morning, but Suni was indifferent to it. ‘You may not need studies or a job; you can do anything to get good marks from seniors or friends. But, I need to stand on my feet, and have to work hard for it. And, I planned things for myself. You used to empty my water bottle at night, and I didn’t mind that as I didn’t have to go out of the building. But this is too much. All that I can plead with you is not to disturb my routine’.

‘How do you know that?’

‘You refused to come with me. It is immaterial how I got to know of it. All these days, I used to feel like your elder and thought I should guide you to better living. With your wonderful language, you demonstrated that you are now on your own. It’s your attitude which hurts’.

Ani planned to understand that in the day. ‘Let’s start for college’, she said.

‘I have to call home. You start, I’ll join you’.

‘I can wait. I have no class right now’.

‘Did I not tell you to start?’

          A few uncomfortable days rolled by. It felt like Q and U were falling apart. One day, the laggard Ani found Suni still in bed. ‘Suni madam, should I sing your Suprabhatam (wake up call)?’

No response was seen or heard. Ani felt Suni’s forehead which was burning hot. She quickly called the doctor, bunked class that day, attended on Suni with great concern, and nursed her back to health in a couple of days. Things returned to normal.

The Final Year examinations had started. The II year students would have it a little later.  One evening, Ani returned to the room, weeping. Though the following day had a tough exam in store for her, Suni’s sisterly instinct made her close her books and pay attention to her room- mate. ‘What happened?’

‘I have been dumped’.

Suni was surprised. ‘By whom?’

‘The boy who loved me’.

‘You were in love, and I’m not even aware of it! Who’s that heartless fellow?’

‘Your class- mate, Sunil’.

‘Sunil? It can never be’.

‘Why not?’

‘Did he express his love for you?’

‘He conveyed it indirectly’.

‘How?’

‘By enjoying my company’.

‘He enjoys my company also. Does it mean he and I profess love for each other?’

‘I hope not’.

‘You need not hope. It is definitely NOT!’

‘But then he’s interested in some other girl’.

‘It’s his choice. Did he seek your company?’

‘No’.

‘Did you pick up a fight with him right now?’

‘No’.

‘How many times did he call you on his own?’

‘Very few times, and that too for college- related issues.’

‘He would have been polite. By the way, I’m aware of his love for someone else. He told me so. If you had told me of this, I’d have nipped it in the bud. Don’t blame him. Now, let me get back to my studies’.

‘Won’t you be by my side in my most difficult moment?’

‘Not when you create a crisis and expect me to douse the flames. I have a crisis waiting to happen tomorrow. You fell for him on your own, so take responsibility for your actions and, be a good girl, and study well’.

‘That’s grossly unfair..’, cribbed Ani.

‘Whatever doesn’t work according to your whims and fancies is unfair by your standards. I can’t subscribe to your tears and theories’.

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A few years rolled by. Suni was successful in whatever she tried. She was spoilt for choice, but she conscientiously chose to be a civil servant, instead of moving westward. The brilliant Ani made it big in the private sector after a management degree from a prestigious institution, but the unchanged aspect of hers was to still get into one-way love, only to be disappointed later; she’d cry over Suni’s shoulder remotely, whenever the latter had time (if at all), and also get reprimanded for being childish and incorrigible.

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